明天將是考試的最后一天
也許是因為是theory paper
導致我多日無法專注讀書
或者是壓力已大大減少了
人際，感情方面一直很復雜的我
又有新的一章
已經有兩個星期
我在冷落一個人
而且冷落的有一點殘忍
To that somebody,
對不起
我已經無法再浪費時間
等待一個茫然的所謂將來
而事事無絕對
就在一個星期前
我又結識了似乎能了解我的人
開始新的一章
無論是不是短斬的時光
至少這一個星期，我是過得快樂的
也許明天考試end了后
必須面對一切
我只希望一切能圓滿解決
而不想象跟幼稚小朋友哭啼喧鬧
Friday, November 28, 2008
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
It takes One to know another
Maybe i am really not suitable for someone
too good
too guai
too decent
too normal
It take another person who is like me to understand what i really mean and really want
I have no mood to study today
I want to wait till after Friday before settling all my emotional burdens
but i just can't
一個人很不開心的時候
不是想喝酒
不是想聊天
而是想寫下來告訴自己
There is people i really don't want to hurt
don't want to see
And
There is people that i really want to see
My heart wrench almost every minute
too good
too guai
too decent
too normal
It take another person who is like me to understand what i really mean and really want
I have no mood to study today
I want to wait till after Friday before settling all my emotional burdens
but i just can't
一個人很不開心的時候
不是想喝酒
不是想聊天
而是想寫下來告訴自己
There is people i really don't want to hurt
don't want to see
And
There is people that i really want to see
My heart wrench almost every minute
Saturday, November 22, 2008
Is my Wisdom coming?
Intended to sleep it full for tonight
4 plus and i'm awoke
by piercing pain at the back of my right jaw
where wisdom tooth appears~~
Is my wisdom tooth popping out?
=(
*ouch*
P.S: I wanna sleep!!!!
4 plus and i'm awoke
by piercing pain at the back of my right jaw
where wisdom tooth appears~~
Is my wisdom tooth popping out?
=(
*ouch*
P.S: I wanna sleep!!!!
Friday, November 21, 2008
Blogging on the East-West Line
Just finished my 2nd paper and on the way out of ntu now.. Yea, I'm blogging on bus 179!
The paper wasn't exactly good coz I couldn't finish it in time *again* haizZ
I tried to attempt all questions but some I only had time to pen down what's the method and not the workings.. So I dun actually feel good about the exam. Nonetheless, I'm only left with that one last paper next Friday before I'm off the burdens.
As I leave the exam hall and boarded the bus, I watched as the juniors gathered after the paper to discuss and complain and move off for lunch at the already not-so-new canteen and I can't help but envy and recall the times, or rather the good times, that I had in school, in hall.
And it's this feeling which made me realised I don't dread studying that much after all. But still too late to go back to the past.
I've got a long journey ahead. Literally cause I'm gg Simei now to meet HL, to go the The Eighteen Chefs which she was captivated by reviews and I guess the mouth-watering pics. Hopefully it'll be good cause they've got cheap student sets LOL
Having only slept for around 2 hours, I am really very lethargic now. Yet I hope my Friday to Sunday would not be wasted so I'll try to fill it in with activities.. I suddenly miss the clubs, bad sign?
Arranged to meet up with the 2 gers after our exams and before Shan disappear for all her trips....
Hopefully it's sunny sentosa chilling at Del'mar .. ^^
+From my Apple iPhone+
The paper wasn't exactly good coz I couldn't finish it in time *again* haizZ
I tried to attempt all questions but some I only had time to pen down what's the method and not the workings.. So I dun actually feel good about the exam. Nonetheless, I'm only left with that one last paper next Friday before I'm off the burdens.
As I leave the exam hall and boarded the bus, I watched as the juniors gathered after the paper to discuss and complain and move off for lunch at the already not-so-new canteen and I can't help but envy and recall the times, or rather the good times, that I had in school, in hall.
And it's this feeling which made me realised I don't dread studying that much after all. But still too late to go back to the past.
I've got a long journey ahead. Literally cause I'm gg Simei now to meet HL, to go the The Eighteen Chefs which she was captivated by reviews and I guess the mouth-watering pics. Hopefully it'll be good cause they've got cheap student sets LOL
Having only slept for around 2 hours, I am really very lethargic now. Yet I hope my Friday to Sunday would not be wasted so I'll try to fill it in with activities.. I suddenly miss the clubs, bad sign?
Arranged to meet up with the 2 gers after our exams and before Shan disappear for all her trips....
Hopefully it's sunny sentosa chilling at Del'mar .. ^^
+From my Apple iPhone+
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Eve of Exam
Every exam period i will feel especially lethargic.
Tomorrow is 3001 paper
Today is another 通宵 mugging
Super behind schedule
I want to bring in a cheat sheet too~ =(
Dragged for half a day, time to start studying~
Off to NTU...
Tomorrow is 3001 paper
Today is another 通宵 mugging
Super behind schedule
I want to bring in a cheat sheet too~ =(
Dragged for half a day, time to start studying~
Off to NTU...
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
2009 is coming
Was prompted to review and reflect upon my 2008 resolutions yesterday by Ms Lingoo, which puts me to think that in fact, for myself and perhaps for most people, i have set the resolution earlier this year in the first week of January to forget by perhaps even February.
To think back, i remembered that i had this own list of things that i wanted in terms or material, money, career, relationships, family, etc
And through this one year, i have seen how some of our unpredictable happenings would twart our plans that much, or this might be my best excuse.
My orginal plan would be that I would have successfully graduated this July 2008 like all my peers and fully embarked on my chosen career path, that is to be a future financial planner. I used the word future as more certifications are required to be called a "Real" Financial Planner, as what alot of others think.
I had hoped to earn and save, to reach certain financial goals, to be able to go on few trips, to be able to save money to eventually go Europe.
None came true.
FIrst, i couldnt graduate. In my 4 years of University education i have not put even half of my effort into it. I was on track to graduate but things just got pretty screwed up. And therefore, one of the first things on the list of "Things to accomplished" was not fulfilled.
This single fall made me pretty sore for quite a significant period of time, which in turn brought about more failures and screw-ups. I cried. But i had no one to blame. Almost half year down the road, I am now in the midst of examinations again. Again i did not studied hard enough. More understanding, more hope but not necessarily higher confidence. Not graduating would mean no need for any form of graduation trip.
I couldnt earn enough as well as save enough for almost anything. For trip and more trips, for material goods, let alone Europe. I am officially still a part-time insurance agent.
Earlier on this year, i was questioned on why did i join this career, which made me really went back home to think and especially the last few months. Alot of people joined this career for many reasons, like freedom, income, flexibility of time, not needing to be under the pressure of intense office politics. Less than often, a new agent will reply with the answer that he/she joined in order to help people or many other gracious reasons. I agree. Until recently, when i realised that i have not prioritised and done the correct things (first), that when i saw the effects or complications that it has brought to people and my heart wrenching for the first time, i think now i can see the good that this career could provide to people.
I have more ot less concluded business for the year of 2008. 2009 will be a fresh new year, with new initiatives and new attitude.
This year was also my 23rd birthday. Wasnt exactly very pleasing, yet not that devastating.
I told myself that i should really try to fork out some time for my mom. I have totally failed in the first half of the year. Recently, i stay at home much more, but still it wasnt for accompanying her. But it is through the ups and downs of this year that i feel that i love my mom and she is one person who i know will always stand by me, though it have to be after a series of nagging.
Friendships have always been something which i valued as a high priority. Over the years i felt i have not failed as a friend to people. I really try my best, even sometimes hindering my own things to go out to help a friend. But it is in this one year, which i feel that i have been a failure as a friend.
Relationships.
Was in part of my resolution in 2008. Not accomplished. So far, in my life, there is only 2 person termed as "Good & decent".
And since 2>0 => it is a good news
There may be 101 things i need to change or fine-tune about myself. But i will. Maybe slowly, but surely. I treat this as an entry to reflect slightly upon myself and i sure hope this will guide me to setting a better range of resolutions for 2009.
E'nuff said.
Back to the books.
Work hard for 2009.
To think back, i remembered that i had this own list of things that i wanted in terms or material, money, career, relationships, family, etc
And through this one year, i have seen how some of our unpredictable happenings would twart our plans that much, or this might be my best excuse.
My orginal plan would be that I would have successfully graduated this July 2008 like all my peers and fully embarked on my chosen career path, that is to be a future financial planner. I used the word future as more certifications are required to be called a "Real" Financial Planner, as what alot of others think.
I had hoped to earn and save, to reach certain financial goals, to be able to go on few trips, to be able to save money to eventually go Europe.
None came true.
FIrst, i couldnt graduate. In my 4 years of University education i have not put even half of my effort into it. I was on track to graduate but things just got pretty screwed up. And therefore, one of the first things on the list of "Things to accomplished" was not fulfilled.
This single fall made me pretty sore for quite a significant period of time, which in turn brought about more failures and screw-ups. I cried. But i had no one to blame. Almost half year down the road, I am now in the midst of examinations again. Again i did not studied hard enough. More understanding, more hope but not necessarily higher confidence. Not graduating would mean no need for any form of graduation trip.
I couldnt earn enough as well as save enough for almost anything. For trip and more trips, for material goods, let alone Europe. I am officially still a part-time insurance agent.
Earlier on this year, i was questioned on why did i join this career, which made me really went back home to think and especially the last few months. Alot of people joined this career for many reasons, like freedom, income, flexibility of time, not needing to be under the pressure of intense office politics. Less than often, a new agent will reply with the answer that he/she joined in order to help people or many other gracious reasons. I agree. Until recently, when i realised that i have not prioritised and done the correct things (first), that when i saw the effects or complications that it has brought to people and my heart wrenching for the first time, i think now i can see the good that this career could provide to people.
I have more ot less concluded business for the year of 2008. 2009 will be a fresh new year, with new initiatives and new attitude.
This year was also my 23rd birthday. Wasnt exactly very pleasing, yet not that devastating.
I told myself that i should really try to fork out some time for my mom. I have totally failed in the first half of the year. Recently, i stay at home much more, but still it wasnt for accompanying her. But it is through the ups and downs of this year that i feel that i love my mom and she is one person who i know will always stand by me, though it have to be after a series of nagging.
Friendships have always been something which i valued as a high priority. Over the years i felt i have not failed as a friend to people. I really try my best, even sometimes hindering my own things to go out to help a friend. But it is in this one year, which i feel that i have been a failure as a friend.
Relationships.
Was in part of my resolution in 2008. Not accomplished. So far, in my life, there is only 2 person termed as "Good & decent".
And since 2>0 => it is a good news
There may be 101 things i need to change or fine-tune about myself. But i will. Maybe slowly, but surely. I treat this as an entry to reflect slightly upon myself and i sure hope this will guide me to setting a better range of resolutions for 2009.
E'nuff said.
Back to the books.
Work hard for 2009.
Monday, November 17, 2008
I brought it upon myself
Again.
I tot i finally gotten the right pace of life
No night outs
No drinking
No clubbing
More concentration
More focus
More meeting of the right people
But deep now my attitude have not changed one bit
Instead of ideally believing that it's the people that i've been meeting is wrong
y not just put it blatantly as i chose to socialise with the wrong people
Slowly
I do not know how to put faith in human relationships
or the once known BGRs
Can guys ever stay loyal to someone?
(in fact, not just guys but an analogy)
I think 80% of the people i know, don't, which is sad
Sometimes u know the things you are doing is wrong
yet you cant help but wonder the response of the other party
The fragility of the human heart
The desire of thrill
what follows is not guilt
but despair & disappointment of humans
Whats the damn diff between the spouse, the girfriend and the fling?
The spouse gets the certification
The girfriend gets the hand, the care, the love
The fling gets the rest
So yes.
Its all my own fault to slide back into this thinking
A part of life really sucks
And i'm still at that part
I tot i finally gotten the right pace of life
No night outs
No drinking
No clubbing
More concentration
More focus
More meeting of the right people
But deep now my attitude have not changed one bit
Instead of ideally believing that it's the people that i've been meeting is wrong
y not just put it blatantly as i chose to socialise with the wrong people
Slowly
I do not know how to put faith in human relationships
or the once known BGRs
Can guys ever stay loyal to someone?
(in fact, not just guys but an analogy)
I think 80% of the people i know, don't, which is sad
Sometimes u know the things you are doing is wrong
yet you cant help but wonder the response of the other party
The fragility of the human heart
The desire of thrill
what follows is not guilt
but despair & disappointment of humans
Whats the damn diff between the spouse, the girfriend and the fling?
The spouse gets the certification
The girfriend gets the hand, the care, the love
The fling gets the rest
So yes.
Its all my own fault to slide back into this thinking
A part of life really sucks
And i'm still at that part
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Exam
2nd day of relaxation at home
i officially gotten the drama fever
just finished watching 溏心風暴之家好月圓 in 4 days
nice show
touching
會心酸
In view that my exam is on friday, which is only 2 days away and I'm only halfway through studying.....
I am desperately curbing the urge to start my next drama marathon
*手癢*
Determined to study today.
Notes are ready
PPS is not on
Hairband up
加油！加油！加油！
Before i forgot,
awhile back i was watching a taiwan variety show 《大學生了沒》hosted by 陶子
and there was an episode discussing about 姓名學
that our name actually affect about 15% of our life
and the expert guest invited discussed about the elements of 姓名學
my mom happen to come in my room and listened for awhile
and towards the end of it
she asked "你有想過要改名嗎？''
We discussed and her conclusion was she felt my current name is too "strong" for me
thats y my character abit 倔 now
Few days after
i was idling and pass by a fortune telling shop and went in for a diagnosis of my name
廖秋瑾
thats my name
An insight to whats right/wrong:
威勢沖天之象，微賤出身， 逐漸長大， 終至首領， 有如凱旋之將， 猛虎添翼之狀， 大志大業可成， 但平素活氣強大， 臨事恐過度為憾， 實貴重之數也。 但婦女有此數則不可。
Likes to stand out, likes to lead, wants to be successful, in work in school in activities. But very tough, hard for things to go the way wanted. Needs to work hard but eventually will have results. However good for guys not for girls.
Some might have already known that my name is named after a particular lady in anicient China history, one who gave up everything and sacrifice for the country and thereafter named as a heroine. But the person at the shop stopped and told me, now that everyone knows the name as a heroine, but is that what she as a woman really wanted? What does a woman really want? Just success and name?
性情偏重一方，言語多少掛角， 柔中帶硬。
This describes relationship, with quite abit of head-on squabbles. It ended off with, not being able to get a blissful marriage or family.
i officially gotten the drama fever
just finished watching 溏心風暴之家好月圓 in 4 days
nice show
touching
會心酸
In view that my exam is on friday, which is only 2 days away and I'm only halfway through studying.....
I am desperately curbing the urge to start my next drama marathon
*手癢*
Determined to study today.
Notes are ready
PPS is not on
Hairband up
加油！加油！加油！
Before i forgot,
awhile back i was watching a taiwan variety show 《大學生了沒》hosted by 陶子
and there was an episode discussing about 姓名學
that our name actually affect about 15% of our life
and the expert guest invited discussed about the elements of 姓名學
my mom happen to come in my room and listened for awhile
and towards the end of it
she asked "你有想過要改名嗎？''
We discussed and her conclusion was she felt my current name is too "strong" for me
thats y my character abit 倔 now
Few days after
i was idling and pass by a fortune telling shop and went in for a diagnosis of my name
廖秋瑾
thats my name
An insight to whats right/wrong:
威勢沖天之象，微賤出身， 逐漸長大， 終至首領， 有如凱旋之將， 猛虎添翼之狀， 大志大業可成， 但平素活氣強大， 臨事恐過度為憾， 實貴重之數也。 但婦女有此數則不可。
Likes to stand out, likes to lead, wants to be successful, in work in school in activities. But very tough, hard for things to go the way wanted. Needs to work hard but eventually will have results. However good for guys not for girls.
Some might have already known that my name is named after a particular lady in anicient China history, one who gave up everything and sacrifice for the country and thereafter named as a heroine. But the person at the shop stopped and told me, now that everyone knows the name as a heroine, but is that what she as a woman really wanted? What does a woman really want? Just success and name?
性情偏重一方，言語多少掛角， 柔中帶硬。
This describes relationship, with quite abit of head-on squabbles. It ended off with, not being able to get a blissful marriage or family.
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